Man/Women truths(?)

[papa delta]

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Peter

[Glynn]

On a similar theme.......

Fifteen reasons why Aeroplanes are easier to live with than women.

1)   Aeroplanes usually kill you quickly – a woman takes her time. 
2)   Aeroplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch
3)   Aeroplanes don’t get mad if you do a ‘touch and go.’
4)   Aeroplanes don’t object to a pre-flight inspection.
5)   Aeroplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
6)   Aeroplanes have strict weight and balance limitations.
7)   Aeroplanes can be flown any time of the month.
   Aeroplanes don’t come with in-laws.
9)   Aeroplanes don’t care about how many other Aeroplanes you’ve flown before.
10)   Aeroplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.
11)   Aeroplanes don’t mind if you look at other Aeroplanes.
12)   Aeroplanes don’t mind if you buy airplane magazines.
13)   Aeroplanes expect to be tied down.
14)   Aeroplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
15)   Aeroplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong.

   However, when Aeroplanes go quiet, just like women, it's usually not good.